My youngest son was born at 25 weeks on 10th December 2021 and spent his first Christmas in hospital.
My eldest son was a result of years of IVF and was a premature baby, he was born at 36 weeks and at the time I felt very unprepared for his arrival a month early. Little did I know my second son would top that at 25 weeks!
Jax was a fighter from conception. Not an IVF baby, ejected into the world 15 weeks early and born breathing.
My labour was fast. I didn't have time to worry about what was going to happen. Before I knew it I was on the ward with crying babies while I sat with an empty cot.
My husband and I won't ever forget Bed 1 of ITU and how we felt seeing Jax lying there. He was covered in monitors and tubes and we had no idea what was coming but oh-my did we learn, and everyone on the ward was prepared to help us do that.
We were quickly taught how to change Jax's nappy and I was shown how to express colostrum and milk. We had expert consultants, doctors and nurses explaining what was happening and giving us the opportunity to ask questions. We had a lot of questions. But no one ever made us feel like they had been asked that same question five minutes before. The team were patient and empathetic.
We were told Jax would likely be in NICU until his due date and that our journey would be like a rollercoaster. Full of ups and downs. The downs would come. And that it was.
Jax had some good days and some wobbles. And when Jax had a wobble, I'd crash pretty hard. I'm grateful for everyone that picked me back up and helped me to get through our stay. No one was obliged to support me but my tears came from nowhere, and all the time, and everyone was so understanding and kind.
The hardest part of NICU for me was splitting my time between the unit and home. Both my children needed me and I needed them. My husband had to go back to work, so we quickly got ourselves into a routine and kept a diary of everything going on so that each of us knew what was happening.
My pattern involved dropping my older son off at nursery and then racing to the hospital to make ward round. I tried to fit in a few gravity feeds, cares, expressing and kangaroo care before leaving to pick my son up. I think everyone knew our schedule. Especially when we called at night and in the morning.
Before each ward round the Neonatal Community Outreach Team (NCOT) team would come round we became really familiar with the team. We knew what Jax needed to do to get home and for the most part, it was a waiting game. Waiting for him grow, to breathe without oxygen, waiting for him to latch.
And he did. He got to the point where he weaned off the oxygen. Latched....and oh how I cried when he did. And at 50% breastfeeding we were allowed to come home under NCOT care.
Their warmth helped us to settle in the first few weeks. Within days Jax's NG came out and sure enough we were soon discharged. I would never have made it through without the help from everyone here. And we definitely wouldn't have got home a month earlier than expected. Jax got to meet his brother and they're pretty much inseparable now.
Jax is now nearly three and absolutely thriving. I hope his story gives a little hope to parents with babies currently on the unit. Hope being probably the single most important thing I have held onto since starting my family.
